God's Death Rattle
Last night, lying in the dark alone with my soul
I imploded. A flower curling its petals inward
Recoiling from damages incurred in Eden.
Eden...presented as a perfect state,
Represented to me an emblem of innocence, of
Willful ignorance obedient to an unexplained command.
My mind grappling--with scriptures heard from
Before I burst, sanguine, through my mother's legs--
Wrestling with the angels standing on my wings
And unlike Yaakov, releasing my hold,
Casting off the anchors
My childhood gave me with my name.
I will persevere, though I fear, though I falter,
Though I weep, feeling the loss of arms that caught me...
They are not lost. They are my arms.
Though my spirit shivers in my body at the scope of
Space now recognized as room to soar through
I am not weakened. It was my strength
That brought me here, that kept me going. Oh! how my eyes are brightened, now the gaslights
Are snuffed and I see by starlight, by moonlight, by soul light.